I look back and realize I must have been
sleepwalking through life.
Had my eyes been open,
I’d have saved myself much grief.
I did you a disservice,
by keeping my soul locked tight.
I didn’t give you a chance to understand
who I was, then used it as ammunition against you.
I kept pushing you away,
while chiding you for not getting closer.
I chastised you for not being romantic,
then I made myself unavailable to you.
It was much easier to blame you
for all our problems.
I was so good at the blame game
that in time, you believed it, too.
I’m so sorry,
for what I put you through.
I was so immersed in my own pain,
I didn’t see the havoc I wreaked.
In finding myself, I nearly lost “us.”
I’m so glad you were blessed with patience–
a lesser man would have given up long ago.
You believed in us, when my faith faltered.
You hung on when I lost hope.
You took my hand and led me back.
for loving me.